Poem 138: Pet Peeves

The topic that I have chosen may not be of interest to some

They perhaps will just ignore it and think that it’s dumb

The research involved reading many lists

There were so many examples, it was hard to resist

These so called “top ten” are seldom the same

In some circumstances, we may be to blame

I am just going to mention a few that appear more than the rest

Some you may not find bothersome, while other you’ll detest

Pet peeves is the subject that will be my muse

There is a few of them that I will randomly choose

People not washing their hands before they leave a washroom

Is more relatable to most because of the pandemic I would assume

People saying “no offense” when you are engaging in a chat

Nine times out of ten will most likely end in a spat

Grooming yourself in a public place people share

Things like applying makeup, clipping nails or even brushing your hair

People doing speech to text seemed to irk quite a few

They want you to use your fingers like the rest of us do

Slow drivers in the passing lane was another complaint

The comments made showed little restraint

Here’s another no no that I never knew

Apparently passengers fiddling with the car radio is something that you shouldn’t do

Sharing your medical conditions in detail is crossing the line

So if someone asks how you are feeling, it’s better to say “fine”

When misplacing something “Where was the last place you were?”

Hell if you knew the answer, this incident would have never occurred

Whether you agree or disagree with any of these it is all fine

Now I want to bring up a couple of mine

The first one I’m sure all of us can understand

Is against all bakeries and I am making a stand

You can make fun of me if you must

When we get to the end of a bag why is there only one crust?

Loaves are being sliced in odd numbers, that’s what is being done

To make a sandwich you are forced to go out and purchase another one

That’s why toasters only come in twos and fours

It’s just a conspiracy that all of us have chosen to ignore

Last but not least is another numbers game that some of us play

Did everyone enjoy their breakfast today?

I eat a cereal that is nutritious but not very neat

The company is “Nabisco” and it’s their “Shredded Wheat”

Eating two biscuits is considered a complete meal

So you open the box to see what it reveals

They are packed in sealed containers that contain three

Just how more inconvenient could this possibly be?

So you take out the two and save the third for the next day

Wrap it up in the torn wrapper and pack it away

There are crumbs on the counter and more on the floor

Twenty four hours later you repeat the same procedure and spill even more

I came to a solution, proving I’m not a total dunce

I now put this trio in a cereal bowl and eat them all at once

No mess to clean just put the residue in the bin

The answer to a problem, a total win

As for those establishments with their yeast and dough

If you can solve this bakery scam, please let me know!